Let's Pretend
by cheezmunky
Summary: Tony and Kate go undercover to catch a serial killer. Stop groaning. This one's fun! And I already have 8 chapters finished! TATE, of course. And GABBY, too. :D Happy, Jenni? Abby? Denaliyasha?
1. Yanking Chains

Disclaimer: Roses are red; Pea soup is green. NCIS isn't mine, but it is Mr. B's.

AN: I, personally don't like this chapter very much. But it's the beginning, so just bear with me. I promise it gets better. Jennifer Paris Morgan betaed it for me. :D Yayness! BUT, all mistakes are mine and I'm to be held accountable. I actually have a cousin who works at the Charleston Navy base. "Hey Chris!" There's an NCIS building there too. Yep! He's gonna get me a jacket. :D Okay, that's it. Part of this first scene may sound like I ripped one of the scenes from 'Doppleganger', but I wrote this last season. This is the 3rd fic I ever wrote.

* * *

Gibbs asked, "Sir? Are you sure?"  
"Yes, Jethro. Send your people in. How you do it is up to you."  
"Yes, sir," Gibbs replied and hung up the phone.  
He swiveled around in his chair to find his colleagues bantering again.  
"Tony, I don't believe in using machines."  
"Why not?"  
"It's artificial. Everything I get is one hundred percent real."  
"You've never used a machine?" Tony incredulously asked.  
Kate shrugged. "It just seems so fake."  
"It's not fake. Trust me. It feels the same as doing it naturally. Come over this weekend and you can use mine. I-"  
Gibbs cut him off. "DiNozzo, no one wants to know about your sex toys."  
Tony and Kate's eyebrows shot up. "What? No! Boss, we weren't talking about- We were talking about Bowflex."  
Gibbs' amused expression twisted into a slightly disturbed one. "Sorry I interrupted. Really sorry.." Gibbs muttered, then cleared his throat.  
"We have a homicide right outside of D.C. A man and a woman, mid-twenties, newlyweds. The wife was a Navy lieutenant just transferred in from Charleston Naval base. This is the fifth in a string of serial murders that seem to be moving up the east coast. None of the victims were killed the same way."  
"Then how do we know it's the same guy?" Tony asked.  
"He leaves poems and only kills newlyweds." Gibbs simply replied.  
"Good enough for me. Let's go." Kate followed Tony's lead and stood, pulling her weapon from the drawer.  
Gibbs watched them in amusement. "You two aren't going."  
The drawer clicked shut. "Why not?"  
"If the murderer's still there, it'd blow your cover."  
"What cover, Boss?"  
Gibbs grinned at the confused looks on their faces.  
"C'mon, Gibbs. What the Hell's going on?" Kate demanded.  
"You two," Gibbs paused. "Are going to be newlyweds."  
Kate frustratedly demanded, "Damn it, Gibbs! Stop yanking my chain."  
Gibbs passed between their desks, on his way to the elevator. "You're the new bait. We'll go over it when McGee and I get back."  
"Boss-"  
"Bye." Gibbs smiled as the elevator doors closed.  
Kate swore as she placed her gun back in the drawer, slamming it shut. "There goes my weekend."  
"More like your next 2 weeks, Kate."  
"What!"  
Tony shrugged. "When Gibbs gets something like this into his head, he makes you do it right. Which means 'getting to know the community'."  
"But we'll be newlyweds. Won't the guy try to kill us almost immediately?"  
Tony sighed. "You of all people should know that you're considered newlyweds until you hit the one year mark. He's got all the time in the world."  
Kate ignored his first comment. "What if he doesn't come after us? He could pass us right over and go on to Newport."  
"If he does, Gibbs'll pull us out." Tony watched, while Kate, apparently content with his answer, sat back down at her desk.  
"Or," he continued. "He'll keep us there and wait for the murderer to come back."  
Kate looked up incredulously from the papers on her desk. "You have got to be kidding."  
"I'm not." Tony said seriously. "Think about it. How many newlyweds in the service, on the Atlantic Coast, could there possibly be? He could kill them all up to Brunswick, turn around and come back down, killing the people who'd gotten married after he came through here."  
"Or, he could move on to the Gulf of Mexico, or the Pacific Coast..." Kate moaned, thinking of all the possibilities. "This is going to suck."  
"Tell me about it. We don't even get a bigger tax return."

* * *

REVIEW! Maybe I'll update something... :D


	2. Questions

AN: Okay, Agent Emily Doseck belongs to me. snerk (waves to her friend) Agents Chaunda(pronounced Shawn-duh, and Chaun is pronounced Shawn), Darin, Garret Syntos, and Agents Kevin, Maria, Shane Grindstaff, and Eric Zyman belong to me as well. To Chaunda: I made ya a Kincaid by name, hon! LOL. The last names are names of people I know. Some of the first names are too, so technically, they don't belong to me. But I'm not getting into the whole 'What belongs to you, but you never use...' riddle. Not right NOW anyways. Go to the Tate and Gabby groups. We can get into it there. Yeah! We have 17 members in the Gabby, and 51 in the Tate now. Yayness! Gabbsters and Taters everywhere! Heheehehe! Jenni, we really DO have to decide on what we'll call ourselves. Hmm... Okay, going on now... Story...

Kate looked up as Gibbs rounded the corner of her desk on his way back from the crime scene.  
"Gibbs, why are we going already going undercover when we just got this case? That guy could be anywhere on the east coast. Isn't that jumping the gun a bit" she asked.  
"She kinda has a point, Boss."  
Gibbs sat down at his desk and looked patiently at his colleagues. "Agent Doseck's team had this case. Her two best field agents were killed by the murderer. He could kill again in the time it'd take for her to break in a new team, so the director's passed it on to us. Rather, us and two other teams. We have a crude path established. The killer will hit one of three bases next. The other two teams will be stationed at Pax River and Willow Grove. We're taking Dahigren. We'll set up at your new house on Friday."  
"This Friday" Kate asked.  
"Yes."  
"Boss, it's Thursday"  
"I know. That'll give you the weekend to settle in and unpack. Any questions" Gibbs looked at them expectantly.  
Kate wasn't about to be one to disappoint. "How long is this gonna take"  
"As long as it takes us to find the killer." Gibbs retorted as, coffee in hand, he headed for the elevator.  
Kate looked blankly at Tony. "What does that-"  
"Pack enough for a month" Gibbs called. The two just stared after their boss.

* * *

The next morning, everyone gathered in Abby's lab to collect their licenses, stationing orders, and credit cards. In addition to Gibbs' team, the two others working the case and Agent Doseck were there. Gibbs had made it clear to Kate and Tony that Agent Doseck was still heading the case.  
The first trio consisted of a black man and woman: Chaunda and Darin, and their boss, a tanned man of about Gibbs' age with sandy blonde hair named Garret Syntos. The third couple -to be stationed at Patuxent River- was a white guy named Kevin, and his hispanic partner Maria. Their boss, a black woman named Shane Grindstaff, and other partner, Eric Zyman were standing with them. Everyone was watching Abby as she pulled their cards from her filing cabinet, and papers as they came off the printer.  
As Abby went about her work, Agent Doseck briefed the group. "Since this happened on such short notice, you'll all be issued new middle and last names, but keep your first ones. We can't run the risk of you slipping up and calling each other the wrong name. After Miss Sciuto gives you your dossiers, go through all of them with your partners. On the car ride to your new assignments, memorize them. You don't know who all will confront you when you reach your destination, or what questions they'll ask. By tomorrow, you should be able to tell me your spouse's zodiac sign and what 'your song' is. I trust you already know the basics of your files now." The couples nodded their assent.  
"Good. Miss Sciuto, whenever you're ready."  
Abby grinned at the formal use of her name as she turned to face the group. "Alright. Chaunda and Darin, you're now Mr. and Mrs. Darin Kincaid. Here ya go."  
Darin winked at his partner. "Hello, Mrs. Kincaid." Chaunda rolled her eyes.  
"Kevin and Maria" Abby continued"you're the Shehans. Tony, Kate, you're the Addamses." She handed them each a manila envelope full of documents.  
"Oh. One more thing." Abby added. "I didn't pick your jobs. Your bosses all did that. Take it out on them. Okay. I'm done now."  
"Gracias, Abby." Maria replied. "Well, Señor Shehan, let's go."  
The second team looked at Garret, who nodded to them, the other bosses, and left. "Guess we go now too. Good luck. Chaun, time to roll out."  
The pair left Gibbs' team standing there with Agent Doseck and Abby.  
"Agent Gibbs, I'll see you at MTAC when you return." With a curt nod, she too left.  
Tony frowned. "Wow. Is she always that impersonal"  
Gibbs sighed. "Actually, Em wasn't always like that. Losing her agents has really taken a toll on her." He paused, silently remembering something none of them could understand. He quickly snapped out of it. "Alright. Bring these boxes of equipment around back. We'll load 'em into your new car and get underway."  
With those final words, Gibbs set his coffee down, hefted a box up into his arms, and headed for the elevator.  
"The ones marked 'dishes' and stuff like that are the ones you need... Don't get hurt" Abby blurted.  
Kate closed the distance and embraced her friend. "We'll be fine, Abby. I promise we'll come back in one piece. Even if my sanity won't be wholly intact."  
"I heard that." Tony said from behind her. Kate moved aside and Tony hugged Abby as well.  
"Kate's right. We'll make it out." he shrugged. "When was the last time she was wrong" With a last pair of grins, the partners left with the last of the boxes. Abby turned up her music, staring with glazed eyes after her friends.

* * *

"You said I'm always right" Kate insisted. As they exited the elevator.  
"No.." Tony argued, sighting Gibbs in the loading dock. "I said, 'When was the last time she was wrong.' That's different."  
"No it's not. Saying there hasn't been a time I was wrong is the same as saying I'm always right"  
Tony sighed. "Kate-"  
"You two! Quit bickering and load up. You haven't even gotten to the base and you're already acting like a married couple." Gibbs rebuked.  
"Just gettin' into character, Boss."  
"Well you're in the wrong character. You're supposed to be newlyweds. Not filing for divorce."

* * *

AN: Willow Grove's in Pennsylvania. I fully expect at least 10 reviews before I post again. I'm 'cruel', remember? So many of you have called me that, so I guess I shouldn't disappoint. Muwhahahaha! So review, if you ever wanna see more again! insert evil maniacal laugh Review! 


	3. Equations

AN: I figured a week was long enough to wait to post again. And besides, you guys left me an additional-what- 21 reiews? Or was it 16? Point is, I asked for 10, and you guys far surpassed yourselves. If I can manage it, the next chapter will come out sooner. : (that was a kiss.)Okies! Someone mentioned that the last chapter(at least the dialogue)was hard to read due to the paragraph placement/absence of excess blank lines. Wow! That made no sense WHATsoever. Oh well. In an attempt to rectify this, I've put spaces between almost one of the lines. So.. Read through this chapter, and when you review, let me know which way you guys like it better. We'll go by majority vote. Got it? Thanks. Oh yeah! Small spoiler for 'See No Evil'. If ya blink, you know the drill. On to the story...

* * *

The car ride conversation to the base was dominated by file memorization- Kate reading the files out loud while Tony drove.

"Caitlyn Danae Addams and Anthony Steven Addams. I have no siblings, but you have two older brothers and an older sister. We married on December 11th, 2004, so we've been married less than 2 months... Oh good God." Kate groaned. They can't seriously expect **us** to to act like people who've been married 5 weeks"

"I think they can, and they do." Tony grinned. "But if you really wanna ask Gibbs, can I listen in?"

Kate glared. "Haha. No. We'll just play that part by ear. But I swear, DiNozzo, if you try to take advantage of this, I **will** maim you. And I assume I don't have to tell you which appendage will go first." She forcefully added.

Sherelented at the look on Tony's face. She shrugged, and looked out her window."Public displays of affection aren't exactly my thing." she admitted.

Tony spared a glance at her. "Really? You seem like you'd revel in that kind of thing."

"I do more blushing than 'reveling'... Don't get me wrong, I like it, and I can pull it off if I need to.."

"Hmm." was all Tony said.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Kate picked up the file where she'd left off. "My dad died when I was 15, so Uncle Charlie walked me down the aisle. Your mother's an ordained Methodist miniser and she performed the ceremony. Hmm. Thebase church is Methodist too.Methodism is based off Catholicism, so I should be fine there. How 'bout you? Do I need to teach you the Apostle's Creed before we go to chapel?"

Tony kept his eyes on the road as he spoke. "I believe in God the Father Almighty, Maker of Heaven and Earth. And in Jesus Christ His only Son, our Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the virgin Mary..."

"Okay, I'll take that as a no. How about the Gloria Patri?"

Tony began in a soft baritone, "Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost..."  
Kate raised her eyebrows. "I'm impressed. Religious studies in college?"

Tony shook his head. "I'm Italian." He shrugged. "I also happen to be Catholic."

Kate nodded. "Sorry."

"For what?"

"For assuming you'd never been in church."

Tony snorted. "My life doesn't exactly lead one to believe that I have."

"I still shouldn't have done that."

Tony brushed it off. "You weren't wrong by much. I haven't been to services in a while. My earthly father was an alcoholic who made my life a living Hell, so I figured my Heavenly one had pretty much given up on me; cut me loose."

"God doesn't give up on people, Tony. People give up on God."

Tony bit his lip, and they sat in a slightly tense silence until Tony spoke up again.

"So, what jobs did Gibbs pick for us? M.P.s, supply, baggers at the local exchange..."

Kate flipped a page of the files. "Actually, you'll be a guard at the base gate, and I'm a yeoman at the base commander's office." She nodded in approval. "We'll have a good handle on what's going on. You'll have access to who comes and goes, and I'll hear the office gossip."

"No fair, Kate." Tony mock whined. "You get the fun job."

She gave him a skeptical look. "Pushing papers all day? Oh yeah. I really lucked out on that one."

"No. I meant the base C.O. Have you seen her? She's a total babe."

Kate sighed. "One, fraternization is illegal here. Two, you're married to me now. And five weeks, is not long enough for you to have already started an affair."

"Maybe I was cheating on you before we got married. Or even engaged." A sly grin played across Tony's lips. "I could even be married to another woman."

Kate smacked his right arm, which caused him to weave slightly in his lane. Kate's cell phone immediately rang.

"What the Hell is he doing?" Gibbs demanded.

"Nothing." Kate replied.

"He's driving like me. Tell Earnhart Jr. to slow his ass down and lay off the tequila." Kate heard a soft click as Gibbs hung up.

"Well?" Tony asked  
.  
"Gibbs said to quit driving like a drunk race car driver. Remember, he's driving that moving van. It won't go over 65."

Kate heard the car decellerate as Tony eased his foot off the gas, and she watched the speedometer drop from 85 to 60.  
"Much better."

"How much longer 'til we're there?" he asked.

Kate keyed up the gps navigator. "Take the next exit onto Smith's Hill Road. Then it's 5 miles straight, a right for 2 miles, a left for 4, and we're on the base. That's 11 miles, so about... 7 minutes."

Sure enought, in 6 minutes and 50 seconds, they pulled up at the base gate.  
Tony turned in his seat to face her. "How'd you do that?"

"Do what?" She absentmindedly asked while messing with her PDA.

"How'd you know we'd be here in under 7 minutes? Aha! You got it from the g.p.s. nav."

"Nope."

"You've been here before?"

"Nuh-uh." Kate motioned that the M.P.? was coming to the car.

"But how'd you-" He insisted.

Kate finally looked up and smiled. "Ask Mrs. Powers when you apologize to her."

* * *

AN: Now... REVIEW! Go! NOW! Oh, btw, I'm working on American Nightmare, I just don't wanna leave you guys with a crappy ending after you've been so good to me. :D I'm all about the people. nods NOW REVIEW! 


	4. Starsky

AN: This chapter is dedicated to my dear friend Kelly, who is leaving us. I'm very sad, so it's a good thing I wrote this chapter a long time ago, otherwise, my mood may have had me killing off most of the characters just to have Kate or someone to share my pain. I'm horrible, aren't I-Cheesmunkee raises her glass of Merlot- "To you, Kels. You made us laugh, you made us smile, but not once did you make us...upchuck bile." :D I've still got some humour left in me. Love you, girl! It's been a blast. ,(

* * *

Getting through the security check had been easier than expected. While an M.P. was checking their IDs, a few others climbed into the trucks and checked the top halves of all the boxes/containers. After 10 minutes, the guard motioned them through. 

Tony raised his eyebrows as they entered the actual base. "Damn. That was easy. Remind me to congratulate Abbs on her hiding of the equipment."

Tony whistled as he entered the house with Gibbs and Kate. "Damn. If all I have to do is search cars and check IDs, this is gonna be a piece of cake."

Gibbs snorted. "IF you can remember which way your uniform goes on every morning."

Tony feigned a hurt expression. "I thought I was pretty good at dressing myself."

Whatever else you could say about Tony- skirt-chaser, clown, player- you couldn't honestly say he didn't have style. At the moment, he was wearing a plain black t-shirt underneath a black leather jacket, along with a pair of baggy, gray, sandblasted jeans.

Tony turned to look at his partner. "Kate seems to a good job, Boss. If you don't like the way I dress, maybe she can help me out." He grinned. "What'cha say, Ka-"

Tony was cut off by Gibbs smacking him upside his head on his way to explore the house.

"Thanks, Gibbs!" Kate sweetly called.

"Anytime," Gibbs grunted.

Tony looked around the room. "Hey, a real fireplace! This house must be older than I thought. Does that mean I have to go chop wood?"

"No!" Gibbs yelled from down the hall. "See the machine inside the fireplace? It's a gas heater. There is a real fireplace in the bedroom. If the power goes out, you can burn wood in there."

Gibbs came back through the bathroom, and kept walking to the front door. "Let's get all that crap in here so we can get the bugs planted. I need to be back at Headquarters, ASAP." He abruptly stopped with his hand on the doorknob and turned to face the pair. "When you go out of this house, whether it's to go to work, or get the newspaper, you two had better be in character. The correct character. Clear?"

"Crystal, Gibbs."

"Got it!" Tony cheerfully replied.

Gibbs looked them both in the eye and adjusted his moustache before opening the door. "Damn, this thing itches." He grumbled.

Tony and Kate had to suppress grins as they moved to stand in the yard, watching Gibbs walk to the U-Haul.

"I can't believe he let Abby put that on him. The only thing she hasn't gotten away with is murder... Yet." Tony joked.

"The black hair's what's killing me. He let her dye it **and** put extensions in it. She definitely has too much power." Kate agreed.

Tony chuckled. "You know who his hair reminds me of?"

Kate gave him a mischievous grin. "Who?"

"David Starsky."

Kate couldn't help but laugh. "Oh my God, you're right. It looks exactly-"

"You must be the Addamses." Kate and Tony whirled around to see a young brunette woman with a chin length bob smiling at them.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."

Tony shook his head. "You just startled us. We weren't expecting anyone."

Tony nonchalantly looked over his shoulder. Gibbs and the other agent were no where in sight. _'They must be in the house.'_ He slipped an arm around Kate's waist, and felt her tense slightly. "Katie and I were just talking about Starsky and Hutch. Do you like the show, Lieutenant...?"

"Lieutenant Tiffany Reel. We'll be working together, ma'am. Yes, sir. I love the movie too."

"Yeah, the movie was pretty funny..."

"Well, I'd better get home. I have to change clothes before I go to the club tonight-"

"The club?" Kate interrupted.

"45 Cherry. It's the base club. Everyone goes there on Friday nights. You guys wanna come with me tonight?"

"Thanks for the offer, but we can't." Kate declined apologetically.

Tony looked down at his 'wife', giving her a wolfish grin as he pulled her closer. "We have to... get settled this weekend."

Kate blushed and looked back to Lieutenant Reel. "It could take a while." She lamely tried to explain.

Tiffany grinned. "I know what you mean. If I'd just gotten back from my honeymoon, I'd stay home all weekend too." She winked at them, causing Kate to blush a deeper shade.

"Nice to meet you, sir. See you on Monday ma'am."

"You can call me Kate."

Tony nodded. "Same here."

"Thought your name was Anthony." She giggled.

"Call me Tony."

"Alright. Kate, Tony, see you around." With a small wave, the girl trotted off.

"Well, _honey_, we'd better get inside before the moving guys dump all our stuff in the bathtub."

Kate turned with Tony's arm still around her waist and they went inside. They found Gibbs and another male agent setting the cream colored sofa down against the wall. Kate cleared her throat and Tony casually removed his arm.

"You did pretty well," he complimented.

"Well, for our first PDA, it wasn't too weird. I just hope she didn't notice anything strange."

"Both of you go grab the boxes from the trucks so Fred and I can start with the bugs. Skedaddle!" Gibbs waved his hands in a shooing gesture.

Kate and Tony shared a sideways glance on their way out the door. "Skedaddle?" Kate murmured. "Where'd he pick that word up?"

"Abby!" Gibbs replied. The pair's eyes widened and they picked up the pace.

Fred chuckled. "You mess with those kids all the time. Aren't you worried you're gonna scar them?"

"Nah." Gibbs smiled. "I'm just keepin' them on their toes."

* * *

AN: Thanks again to Jennifer Paris Morgan, for once again daring to gain insight into my insanity by reading the unedited version of this fic. :D All credit goes to her for keeping Tony from whistling too many times in a paragraph. ;) Oh, and Kate knew how long it'd take to get to the base because she did the math. Ya know, rate, distance, time... Was a spoiler for 'See No Evil'. All sadness, gratitude, and emotions aside, REVIEW! Maybe you'll motivate me to finish writing chapter 5. I know I said I had 8 chapters of this written, but did I say I had them in order? No, I didn't. Muwahahaha! Let this be a reminder to you that ingenuity doesn't always make sense. :D Wasn't that conceited? LOL. Just kidding. But really. Yes, Tony. I stole that from you, again. :D Oops! REVIEW! 


	5. Nesting

AN: Okay, it's all fixed now. Sorry for the inconvenience of the giant paragraph, but special thanks to Malaskor, Denni, Wolf Jade, Salem Navy, and jtb, and for pointing it out to me. I uh, checked it twice in the preview/edit thingy provides, but I guess the formatting snafu'd somewhere along the way. Oh, and if you'd like to know what fubard and snafu are, just ask. Hehe. But be warned they contain the f-word. Hehe. Just trying to be nice. Oh, and everything is the same in the story as before with the small exception of this Author's Note. ;)

AN: Yes, I'm back! I know you want an update of Not Another One, but I'll get around to that later. This is what I have typed. So, there! All unnecessary notes are saved for the end of this chapter. :D Oh, and I just realized I have chapter 5.2 on here also! So be nice, and review a whole friggin' lot! Maybe I'll give you an extra gift as retribution for my absence. Hmmm... Maybe 'retribution' wasn't the best word... Oh, and anyone who's not reading Theoretical's story, 'NA', really should! I'm not endorsing her story because I know her(I guess it's a her), I actually don't know her. Never even emailed her to my recollection. It's just awesome! Reminds me of 'Bad Kitty' and my other funky ones. :p And the old JAG ones. ¡sob! It's the end of the world as we know it! To you, JAG, I'll miss you old friend/clang of margarita glass/ Expect to see wallpapers and poems on my site as tributes to a friend who was there for me through it all. JAG, of course. :D Been watching since I was 6. :D On to the story!  
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
It had taken the four of them a mere 15 minutes to plant the mini motion sensors and cameras. Fred and Gibbs had assembled them while Tony and Kate placed them, trying their best to look inconspicuous- which turned out being harder than they thought. They finished with the last sensor, placing it in a crack between a flowerpot and the wall next to the doorbell and reentered the house, shutting the cold out behind them.

"Boss, remind me why we need these things; Kate promised she'd keep her hands off of me." Tony grinned suggestively at his partner.

"I said I'd try to restrain myself from strangling you." Kate corrected.

Fred cocked an eyebrow, looking from the younger agents to Gibbs questioningly.

Gibbs nodded at him. "Always." He replied. "Tony, we need 'these things' because one pair of victims was drugged prior to death. If you two are passed out when the killer comes, the motion sensors will pick it up and someone at NCIS can call the M.P.s."

"And if he gets away before the cavalry arrives, we'll have a photo of him. Got it. So... Where does all this stuff go?" Tony asked.

Gibbs grabbed the hand truck. "That's for you to decide."

"What? Gibbs, there are a lot of boxes here." Kate protested.

"That's why you came today. You have all weekend to unpack. Abby labeled the boxes for you."

Kate looked around. They were standing in the only floor space not occupied by containers. She also noticed that the couch was backwards against the wall.

"Well...what about the sofa?" She spluttered.

Gibbs shrugged. 

"Tony's good at moving furniture. Just think of it as... nesting."

"I-," Tony started.

"Bye." Gibbs called as he left the house.

Fred gave them an apologetic smile as he followed his friend. "Sorry, guys. Good luck."

The door closed quietly behind Fred, leaving Kate standing in the living room, staring in defeat at the various sized boxes.

"I cannot believe he's leaving us with all this crap."

"Believe it." Tony replied as he moved away from the window. "They just pulled out of the driveway." 

"Fine." She sighed. "Let's start in the bedroom, since it's in the back of the house. That way we can change clothes too."

The pair tediously made their way through the sea of containers to the back room.

"At least they left all the big stuff basically where it goes. The mattress is already on the bed." Tony said optimistically.

Kate smirked at him, but let any undertones of his comment go. "Help me push this dresser against the wall."

Moving the dresser was a fairly easy task; it being on a carpeted floor, they simply rocked it back and forth until it was flush with the wall. 

"Now what?" Tony asked.

"Now," Kate said. "We go find the bedroom boxes and bring them in here. Last one to trip and break an ankle wins." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Chapter 5 has actually been split into 5 parts.:  
5.1 Nesting  
5.2 Urban Lullaby  
5.3 Take It Easy  
5.4 Roses Are Red  
5.5 Déjà vu  
Yes, it's really that long. Each chapter is as long as my normal chapters. I'm not cheating you. Deja vu's name will be changed. I just can't think of the word yet. The thesaurus in my head is broken. Also, any mistakes made in this chapter belong to me. But after this one, blame it all on Jennifer. :D Oh, and does anyone know the SOP for getting deliveries on base? I'd ask my uncle-who's Army-, but I don't have IM yet, and emailing him would take forever. LOL. Thankees. : (


	6. Urban Lullaby

AN: Yes, I'm back! I know you want an update of Not Another One, but I'll get around to that later. This is what I have typed. So, there! Um, the name of this chapter comes from a scene I cut about going to sleep in front of the t.v. being a sort of Urban Lullaby, which in turn, made me think about gangwarfare and gunfire being more of an urban lullaby. Of course, I live in the country, so all I hear at night are crickets and the occasional barking dog. :D So all that was purely speculation and assumations. Is assumation even a word? Hell, who cares. On to the story! ----------------------------------------------------------------------  
"Kate, it's 5:30! You're not seriously planning on unpacking all this before bed, are you?"  
"Unpacking, no. Setting up the basics, yes." Tony's expression of incredulity morphed into one of horror.  
"Cut it out." Kate chastised. "We're done with the bedroom, the bathroom's just stocking the essentials, and there's not much to do in here. We'll be finished by dinner time."  
Tony perked up. "Speaking of dinner, what're we going to eat? We didn't 'pack' food."

Kate shrugged. "We'll get take out and gogrocery shopping tomorrow. I don't know if you can actually get food deliveries on a base." She gestured to the furniture and Tony obediently took his place at the other end of the couch and stopped.

"Where're we putting the t.v.?"

"I don't know. It's not like we'll be watching it." Kate replied.

"Actually, I will. It helps me think."

Kate sighed and pointed to where the television was against the wall behind her. "The wall next to the kitchen's as good a place as any."

Tony smiled mischievously at her phrasing, but quickly wiped the look from his face as she turned back to him. "Good. I was hoping we wouldn't have to move it. After we move the shelves, do you want the bathroom or living room?"

"I'd prefer the bathroom, if you don't mind."

"Good. Let's do this thingy."

Kate cocked her head to the right as they began scooted the shelves against the walls. "Your inner mover's finally surfaced." She teased.

"I've moved five times. And I'm hungry."

Kate navigated her way through the boxes to the next shelf. "I should've known to start with your stomach."

"The way to a man's heart, Katie."

Kate rolled her eyes as they set the mahogany shelf against the back wall. It only took another 5 minutes to move the third shelf and two corner pieces. When they were finished, Tony inclined his head in a slight bow.

"Milady, I'm ready to conquer the living room." He grinned as Kate shook her head and left the room.

"You really need to lay off the Disney movies. Didn't Ducky say it's unhealthy for a grown man to watch cartoons about busty princesses?" She called behind her.

"I told you I was babysitting. Besides, it's actually kind of fun to hear all the jokes you never caught as a kid. I've also learned two things: Billy Crystal and Nathan Lane sound A LOT alike, and princesses who want out of their kingdoms dress a lot sluttier than the poor girls and princesses who were kicked out."

Kate simply shook her head as she began unpacking toiletries. 'Only Tony.' She thought. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Tony spent the next little while dragging end tables and coffee tables into place around the love seat, sofa, and armchair. As soon as he'd plugged in the phone in the kitchen and put the books up on the shelves, he stepped back and smiled. Now he could get to the good stuff.  
"Like this." He murmured as he rummaged through a large cardboard box and pulled out a large black 5-disc stereo and gingerly set it down on the tall coffee table. He also lifted the speakers and set them up on either side before plugging it in. Kelly Clarkson's voice blasted out, and Tony quickly turned down the volume.

_As he seems  
And more Heaven than a heart could hold  
And if I try to change him  
My whole world-_

"Hey, turn that up a bit!" Kate yelled from the bathroom. Tony obliged her and the strains came out stronger.

_It just isn't right.  
It just isn't right.  
Oh 'cuz I don't know  
I don't know what he's after  
But he's so beautiful- _

Tony smiled to himself as he made his way to the bathroom and knocked on the closed door.

"Don't open the door! I have boxes there."

Tony spoke louder to be heard over the music and through the door. "Didn't Doseck say we needed a song? This one could be it, seeing as it's about some girl head over heels for a guy."

Kate listened to a few more words and grinned. Tony had absolutely no idea what the song was about. "You are a disaster." She agreed.

Tony made a face behind the safety of the door. "Funny. Now we just need the CD." 

"I actually have it in my case."

"Sweet." 

"I've got about 15 minutes left in here and I'm done. As soon as you finish the living room, we can go eat."

"Yes!" Tony cried and hurried back to his job. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- 

The next box he opened contained various shelf fillers- trinkets. He dumped them on different shelves of the corner units, set up the DVD player and VCR, and opened one of the two remaining boxes; the one marked as 'photos'. Tony almost laughed out loud at the contents. The bottom half were case files and crime scene photos. But the top half were pictures from the camera where they'd been screwing around. In addition, there were frames, a manila envelope, and three photo albums. The white one was filled with empty sleeves, the black one was Tony's, and the red one with the carousel horse, he assumed to be Kate's. One of the items on Gibbs' list of things for them to bring had been pictures. He'd actually made them both run home on Thursday at lunch to get them and take them to Abby. Tony had been wondering what Abby was going to do to them.

Taking a look to be sure Kate wasn't coming, he opened her photo album and almost choked. It was a picture of Kate and himself holding hands at what looked like a wedding rehearsal. He was pretty damn sure they'd never done that, but the people in the pictures could've been their clones. Tony quickly flipped through the remainder and found pictures like that throughout the rest of the album. It was filled with photos of them at the beach, Christmas parties, amusement parks, and skiing. Tony dropped the book on the couch next to him and pulled out his black one. He sharply inhaled as the white brilliance of Kate's dress popped out at him. It was a simple, but elegant strapless, and she had her hair down and curled in ringlets behind the veil. The next two pictures were of the throwing of the bouquet and… him pulling the garter off.

'…Nope. Definitely don't remember that one.' He thought.

Tony heard a sudden noise in the bathroom and tossed the book next to the other.

"You okay?" He yelled.

"Fine! I'll be done in a minute. You ready?"

"Uh, almost." Tony opened the manila envelope and pulled out various sized photos Abby'd apparently chosen to be displayed. Without taking time to look at them, he framed and placed them in appropriate spots around the room. He'd just finished when Kate walked in.

"Wow." She stood there for a moment, admiring Tony's handy work. The room looked nice, with the small exception of the corner pieces filled with junk. But she could fix that later. She suddenly laughed out loud when she saw the picture frames on the end table.

"What?" Tony self-consciously asked. Kate bit back another laugh.

"For one, that photo's upside down. But did you happen to notice the maid of honor?"

Tony picked up the frame and flipped it before grinning. Staring back at him was a picture of their lab tech standing behind Kate, wearing a red dress with her hair up in a French twist. "I guess we aren't the only ones Abby photo shopped in." ---------------------------------------------------------------------- 

AN: Chapter 5 has actually been split into 5 parts. 5.1 Nesting 5.2 Urban Lullaby 5.3 Take It Easy 5.4 Roses Are Red 5.5 Déjà vu Yes, it's really that long. Each chapter is as long as my normal chapters. I'm not cheating you. Deja vu's name will be changed. I just can't think of the word yet. The thesaurus in my head is broken. Also, any mistakes made in this chapter belong to me. But after this one, blame it all on Jennifer. :D Oh, and does anyone know the SOP for getting deliveries on base? I'd ask my uncle-who's Army-, but I don't have IM yet, and emailing him would take forever. LOL. Thankees. : (


	7. Take It Easy

Chapter 5.3: Take it Easy -  
AN: I typed this up in the previous format I was writing in. Until I can update the other chapters' formats, this one will remain the same as well so the reading of it will be smoother. I figured I owed you guys an update before I posted any new fics. I'm deeply sorry for being AWOL this long. I will be on regularly now. I didn't get mynet hooked up until a few days ago, and I was going to post last night, but I needed to have a meaningful conversation with one of the few people who are close enough to me to take percedence over my writing. Yes... It was a boy... Heehee.  
Hellfire, this chapter's dedicated to you for harrassing me. Thank you.  
-  
"You ready to go?" Tony asked. 

"Just gotta get my coat. It's in the bedroom."

"I'll go on out and warm the car."

Tony shrugged his leather jacket on and braced himself for the harsh cold of the Pennsylvania winter. Making a mad dash, he dug the keys out of his pocket and jumped into the car, turning the heat up full blast.  
A minute later Kate locked the front door behind her and slid in beside him, shutting the cold out with the slam of the door.

"Jeez, it's cold out there."

"Sorry. I forgot to warn you. But this is actually kinda warm for up here. Philly's worse."

"It's twenty degrees and it's only six-thirty. I'm so glad I don't live in Canada. Although I do love their beer."

She turned her gaze to Tony. "So, Mr. Addams, where are we going?"

Tony grinned mischievously. "I was thinking McDonald's..."

That earned him a glare from his partner.

""-but, we can compromise and hit Wendy's instead."

"Fine by me. There's one about five miles from here. Just go straight to the next intersection and cut a right."

"Kate buckled her seatbelt and turned on the radio as Tony began the short drive from their 'home' to the gate. Settling on a station as they finally cleared the gate, she sat back and began listening to the music. Fifteen seconds later, she laughed out loud.

"This is so you." She explained and cranked up the volume.

_'...I've got seven women on my mind.  
Four that wanna hold me  
Two that wanna stone me  
One says she's a friend of mine...'_

"Well which one are you?" He impudently asked.

"Definitely one that wants to stone you."

Tony grimaced.  
"Ouch, Kate. Can't you just be a friend of mine?"

"Knowing what you do with your friends, I'll take a rain-check."

"So that's a maybe later. Looking forward to it. You know, this song's kind of you too."

_'Take it easy  
Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy  
Lighten up while you still can  
Don't even try to understand  
Just find a place to make your stand  
And take it easy...'_

Kate narrowed her eyes at the smirk on his face. "Is that supposed to mean something?" she inquired.

"Nooo. Well, yes. You could lighten up a bit; let your hair down every once in a while. I mean, we only have one life. Don't you want it to be a happy one?"

"Tony, my hair is down. That's how I almost always wear it."

Tony rolled his eyes as they pulled into the parking lot and turned the car off. "You know what I mean. Eat in or take out?"

"We don't have anywhere to eat at home." She reminded him. "What are you smiling at?"

"You just said 'home'. Admit it; you just wanna play house."

"Get out of the car."

* * *

They sat down at a quiet corner table a few minutes later, Kate with a mandarin chicken salad and Tony with french fries and a cheeseburger that should have been too large to fit in his mouth. Kate passed him his food and one of the frosties as he plopped down across from her. She cringed as Tony poured salt over his fries and popped one in his mouth. 

"Did you hear that?" she murmured.

Tony frowned. "Hear what?"

"Your arteries hardening."

Tony laughed at his partner's disdain for his food. "Salt's good for you."

"Not that much. Those french fries are gonna give you a heart attack!"

"Aw. Worried about me?"

"No, I'm worried about explaining your corpse to Gi- everyone."

Tony replied by eating another fry. Kate sighed in exasperation at Tony's apparent death wish.  
"Your funeral."

"Your dead husband." He retorted.

Kate ignored him. "Okay, when we get 'home', we need to finish unpacking our marriage certificates and other papers. We also have to make a grocery list so all we have to do in the morning is go buy it. Oh! And call your dad."

Being undercover was harder than she had thought it would be. Having to refer to Gibbs as Tony's father- her father-in-law- was more than a little creepy. Although, Kate couldn't figure out if it was because it meant she and Tony were married, Gibbs was her father-in-law, or a little bit of both.

Tony simply nodded at her to do list as he took another bite of his burger. Sometimes Kate wished they ate out more often; Tony's manners were infinitely better in public.

* * *

Tony tossed the keys down on the nearest end table as he sat down on the couch beside Kate, who was already setting case files up on the coffee in front of them. As she continued arranging the files, Tony sighed. 

"Do we really have three hours of this?"

Kate looked askance at him. "It's our job, Tony."

"After 'nesting' all day?"

"Yes. Where do you wanna start?"

Tony's grim expression clearly said he didn't want to 'start' anywhere at all. Kate set her jaw.

"We'll start at the beginning then. Drake and Francis Corsche from Key West, Florida. The couple, white, mid 20's was on their honeymoon at a beach in Key West. They were shot in the water, bullet wounds to the chest and upper abdomen. The bullet couldn't be traced because the inside of the muzzle had been filed down, but it was a round from a sniper rifle. There weren't any prints found. The husband was an ensign navigator aboard the Nimitz, and the wife, Francis, was a civilian bank teller..."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: I know I have 4 or 5 other victim profiles to add. I have them typed up, believe it or not, in a document called, 'Victim Profiles' of all things. BUT, they're in the next chapter 5.4: Roses are Red, so you guys may have your update. I love you all. Jenni didn't get a chance to beta this, so don't blame her. I love you, girl! Email me! REVIEW! I wanna see how many of you got the jokes. And yes, the Canadian beer thing was a tribute to riccinbru's Fortune Favours: Decoy. If you haven't read it, do it. It's a classic. REVIEW!


End file.
